Really Living

Have you ever just stopped to think 

What is life? Where do I belong? or What am I doing? 

When life is feeling so overwhelming, and you can’t figure out what’s going on, 

Is that when you throw in the towel or say enough is enough?

Something to think about! Huh 

At that moment, we can either realize: 

  • I am a child of God, and I have a purpose to fulfill 
  • I will put my Trust in God and not focus on the past

Or will you dwell on your emotions that are holding you back from Everything God has for you to accomplish in your life?

The reason I’m writing this is to Encourage you today to open up and let All your emotions out. 

So you can be Free to Live a Total Freedom Life.

 In 1970, I was born with a Hemangioma that went deep into my breast. The doctor watched it for many years until he and my mom decided to have it removed when I was 5 or 6 years old. I had so many complications from this over the years. 

My childhood was not a normal one; my mom and dad were in and out of my life. My mom would try to take care of us, but she had her own issues to deal with, from not dealing with her emotions. I remember her taking us to live in so many places, and after a while, my Aunts and Uncles would come to get us; no matter where we were in the USA, they got us and brought us home to Great Aunt Nora’s and Great Uncle Troy’s house. That was my safe place! 

After many years of trying to take care of us, my mom realized she couldn’t take care of us and brought us back home to Aunt Nora and Uncle Troy’s to stay. Mom would come around every now and then after that, usually wanting something. 

My dad came around even fewer times, but when he did, I was so happy to see him. A little girl loves to see her daddy even if he’s not really in her life much. My dad’s mom, Grandma Mary, and all of their family were there for me; I loved seeing all my family. 

My Aunts and Uncles made a huge impact in my life. Looking back over my life, I see so many times I could have been killed on the road with my mom just because of the wrong decisions she made. 

I am so grateful to God for allowing a loving family to be there to raise and take care of my siblings and me. If not for them stepping up, we wouldn’t be here today. 

Aunt Nora taught me how to live a life with God. She would be reading her Bible when I got up every morning, and when I came home from school, she would be reading it then. She had so much patience and love. Every night I would hear her praying for everyone, calling out their names, praying for God’s will to be done in their lives, for God to save them and keep them safe. She would pray for hours with such passion, and I would lay in bed listening to every word. Since I’ve grown up, I have seen her prayers be answered so many times after she passed away; those mighty prayers are still being answered today. It is a wonderful gift my Aunt Nora gave me and made me want to be a prayer warrior just like her. 

I know all those times we were with my mom scared, Aunt Nora and others were calling out our names in prayer, and God answered every one of their prayers for us. He kept us safe and brought us home every time. 

My wonderful Aunt Nora never had kids of her own, but she raised 7 of us. We were her last ones to raise. We lost Uncle Troy in 1980; I found him on the front porch and blood all over the porch. That was a very hard time, but God got us through it, and my Aunts and Uncles stepped up to help Aunt Nora. 

There is so much to share, but throughout my life, I saw things a child should not see from their mom. Before my mom and dad passed, I told them I forgave them, and they apologized for everything. (They both passed in 2014)

My Health

In 2015, I had a biopsy and was told I had Sarcoidosis on the brain and spine. I had never heard of that and couldn’t believe what I was hearing. We were relieved it wasn’t the C word. Then they said it was not curable.  

For seven years, I have been on so much medicine and taking infusions every six weeks for the last six years. I felt like a ginny pig for most of those years. 

In September of 2022, I went to a Women’s Conference in Chattanooga, TN. My daughter had asked me to go with her. This was her first women’s conference, and I usually didn’t go anywhere because of the pain…  

The atmosphere when we walked in was amazing. You could tell people had been praying and fasting for the conference. The Spirit of God was so strong, and it reminded me of my early years with God.  I lost my singing voice in 2016 from all the medicine I was taking. 

We were at the conference for three days, and every day I was touched by God. The speakers were preaching and teaching about a close relationship with God. Hearing His voice and obeying Him. I have always prayed for a close relationship with God, so my spirit wanted a closer walk with God. I found myself praying for God’s will to be done in my life and His people’s lives. Throughout those days, God was working on me in so many ways. 

I felt like God asked me, Do You Trust Me? My soul cried out, “I TRUST YOU, LORD.” Over and over and over again, I YELLED out I TRUST YOU! 

Another day, during preaching, they were talking about Laying it All down that was hindering you or stopping you from your healing, whatever was holding you back from growing in God. There were thousands of people there crying out to God and Singing His praises; I heard myself start crying out, “I LAY IT ALL DOWN,” over and over, I said those words. While saying that, I TRUST YOU, and I LAY IT ALL DOWN. I saw my past and every single time, starting when I was born, till now, that God has kept me alive and protected and helped me all these years. He is so Faithful to us; all I could do was cry out even louder how much I Love my Savior, Jesus!! When I left the conference, I was different when I proclaimed I TRUST GOD, and I LAYED DOWN everything that was eating at me deep down, All these years. I felt different, going into the conference on a walker and leaving able to walk steadily and with no help. IT Was Amazing!! 

When we think this is how I have to live because of circumstances, It’s Not True. I had let All the hurt, disappointment, anger, and many other things)  from my life (which I thought I had dealt with many times) go down deep inside me, hiding in there like a scared little girl wanting to truly Trust people, but afraid to let go and be hurt again.

God showed me that I had, over time, forgiven people for all the hurt and pain they put me through, but I never really dealt with it, only hid it deep, deep down inside of me, and that’s why insecurity has tormented me my whole life. But when I let the healing start by opening my mouth and proclaiming I Trust God and Lay Down Everything that has come against me throughout my life, A weight was lifted, and God’s refreshing power could flow threw my life, making me Completely Whole! 

Wow, What a mighty God we Serve. Trust Him and Believe what He says about you. You are a Child of the Kings of Kings and Lord of Lords!

It’s Time to Really Live and Let Go of the Past! 

Our Future Looks Bright!! 

The Best is Yet to Come!!

Don’t do as I did and think just because you forgave someone, you have dealt with the issues. 

Lay It All Down at the Feet of JESUS and Leave it there…

Let’s do some Real Living and Finish the race we were put here to finish with no regrets. A Total Freedom Lifestyle.

Always Trusting God,